By Sara Tehrani
Contributing Writer
1. Flashing Your Wealth
A Porsche, a Bentley, a private jet, two mansions, a summerhouse and your father does what? Impressive.
Not. So you’re a filthy rich SOB with [almost] enough dough to rival Bill Gates and the entire IBM Empire. This does not impress me. By directly or indirectly telling me that you are loaded for generations to come, I am to believe that you can provide a properly secure future for a spouse and family… but I have also learned that you lack all sense of humility. Your family hasn’t lifted a finger in three generations? I’m intrigued (read: gag me). Here’s a secret: nobody likes you. When you refer to strangers as “the help” this is considered rude; When you brag about being the country club’s favorite member, nobody’s listening. It’s not that I have anything against wealthy individuals; I do believe that there are very hard-working people out there who have created their wealth and at the same time aren’t throwing it in everyone’s face.
The bottom line is, I don’t care if you bathe in expensive perfume and wear a different designer outfit every day, because at the end of the day, nobody is talking about your new plastic surgery operation (unless you look like a duck) or about the summer wardrobe that could have fed a small country. Rather, people will be talking about your taking time to work at the homeless shelter, or at the very least, going a day without shoving your stacks in someone’s face. It’s annoying, rude and unbearable.
Just stop. Try it. I dare you.
2. Not Being Upfront or Honest with Feelings
Let’s play a love game. Lady GaGa is an advocate.
Wait. Let’s not. Unless you are still in high school or your main desire in life is to lure guys/girls and then just having them hanging around, playing games is not for you. And, it shouldn’t be for anyone. It’s one of the worst things you can possibly do, and I have to admit, girls are more often at fault here than guys. Because girls (generally) have more trouble with trusting themselves and others, they will play games with guys and are rarely straightforward with their intentions. But that’s not to let guys off the hook that easily; they play games just as well as the females and can become unbelievably competitive.
So if you are legitimately interested in the cutie sitting across from you in Chemistry Lab, ask him/her for their number. Sometimes you will be pleasantly surprised with their response. That is, if they respond with at least seven numerical digits and not with harsh chemicals they may be working with at the time.
But if you choose to continue your ways, you have been warned: If you have a habit of stringing people along and leading them on, you will be burned in the end. You may avoid some immediate heartache by causing it for another, however, not only does this create difficulties for you in the future, but it indicates a serious issue with yourself by prolonging this terrible habit.
3. Missing a Funny Bone?
“I dropped my funniest joke and she didn’t even blink. “
“Dude, the one about the penguin in a suit and tie? Hilarious. Don’t sweat it, who knows what her problem is.”
Unless you enjoy being referred to as “the girl with the stick up her …rear”, my only advice is… Lighten Up! Seriously, allowing one of those things we call smiles flash across your face is highly tolerated in today’s society. Not just that but it’s attractive! It’s enormously annoying when a person you are speaking to has no sense or appreciation of humor. So maybe you’re really bad at interpreting sarcasm and witty remarks through technology. Work on it! And try dropping your own funny stories, jokes and one-liners. Even robots are programmed to laugh these days (http://dvice.com/archives/2007/09/laughing-robot-provides-therap.php). So quit being so annoying and pick up a sense of humor… Or we’ll program it into you while you sleep.
4. We’ve Got a Stage Five Clinger…
“I’ve gotta get out of this pronto! We’ve got a stage five clinger… I repeat: Stage Five Clinger!”
Everyone’s seen one. Or heard of one from a friend of a friend’s cousin’s boyfriend’s sister. Yep. A clinger. Ranking quite high on this list, a clingy boy or girl is always agonizing to deal with and/or witness. They are irritating, suffocating, and, brace yourself for the big one… NEEDY. It’s not attractive or desirable at all. It is quite common in females, however, not at all unusual for males, in which the trait can often be more disturbing.
Tips: Don’t cling to your partner. Easier said than done? False. Just spend time away from your partner doing things you like with your friends (that you hopefully did not ditch for your boy/girlfriend). Be yourself around him/her, and you won’t seem as desperate or needy.
Attention clingers of all stages! Here is your wake up call.
Nobody wants a clinger. So quit it.
5. OMG, IDK, LOL, C U L8R
Texting: It’s fast, convenient and is yet another piece of technology crumbling our society’s foundations. But that’s not the point…
The point is that you are on a coffee date with an old friend, in class dissecting a squid, and in the car driving your date to the movies. You are. And what is the person next to you doing? Texting, of course. Texting the next person they will meet up with after you, texting their friend living in Portugal or texting their friends for advice on a first date.
I won’t even get into the whole “What has happened to the world? Where is the face-to-face interaction? Where is the humanity?”, but rather I will say this: STOP IT YOU ARE BEING SO RUDE!
Maybe it has to do with our generation not being properly educated on etiquette, but people should just know that texting in public is one of the most annoying things a person can do, especially if they are in the presence of another person, in a conversation or in an educational setting. Really? You can’t wait until after class to decide what shoes to wear to the semi-formal?
Try going to your local café and seeing how many people are having actual conversations and how many are texting away while “listening”. Texting is essential in ensuring contact with friends and family, however, it’s not an excuse to be discourteous. It makes you seem uninterested in the other people you are around. Plus, you’re going to get carpal tunnel and/or tendonitis if you keep that up. Aside from texting, there are just some places where people have to be reminded not to speak on their phone. For example: movie theaters, restaurants, classrooms and libraries. If you actually need to be told, then I question your common courtesy skills.
So put your phone down and you will be free to delete another one of your annoying habits from this list.
6. Borrowing and/or Not Returning
“Michelle borrowed my favorite pair of new jeans three weeks ago and STILL hasn’t returned them! I haven’t even worn them yet and they were super expensive! Ugh, she is such a bad friend!”
Borrowing without asking and borrowing without the intention of returning is called stealing. Just thought I should clarify that.
This is one of the most frustrating habits one can possess. If you borrow without asking or don’t return borrowed items to friends, not only will you not be very liked among your group of friends, but people will start to lose trust in you as a person. When someone gives you a personal item to borrow and hopefully return, they are trusting you with their belongings. Seriously, it’s not cool to hold on to people’s stuff for too long. If you’re going to borrow something from someone, plan on giving it back and in the same condition you received it. Dry-clean it, steam it, refill it, color it, do whatever you have to but do your best to maintain that person’s trust. Just don’t be a douche, everyone hates people who don’t return borrowed stuff.
7. Putting Yourself Down (girls) and/or Lack of Confidence (guys & girls)
Boyfriend: “You’re beautiful, you know that?”
Girlfriend: “No I’m not, shut up! OMG look at how ugly and un-photogenic I am! I just gained 20lbs! God I hate you why can’t you just tell me how hideous I am and leave me for someone prettier! Just get it over with!”
Whoa.
This the classic example of a guy complimenting his girlfriend with two words and her flipping out and doing just about everything a guy never wants in a girl. These include: putting yourself down, having low (or no) self-esteem and self-confidence, comparing yourself to other girls, and attacking him all because of one compliment.
FIRST OF ALL (this is in bold because it is very important): A guy will never compliment you just for fun. If he is telling you he thinks you’re beautiful… he thinks you’re beautiful. So shut up.
Stop putting yourself down; really, guys hate it. A boy is not going to lie to you and tell you he thinks you are pretty, just like he will not ask you out on a date if he really doesn’t want to see you. Learn to take a compliment and quit being so insecure because nobody likes that either. Having confidence is extremely attractive to all people.
And to guys reading this, that’s confidence, not cockiness. Just as horrible as it is for a guy to lack all confidence, it’s terrible for a guy to be cocky as well. No one wants to feel as if they have all the power in a relationship because their man can’t stand up and say anything and just agrees with his partner. Likewise, nobody likes a person who is vain, full of themselves and uninterested in what others have to say. Cockiness may be a turn-on to shy, insecure girls at first, but it gets old. Fast.
So if there’s anything you can take away from this, let it be that insecurity, and lack of confidence is one of the worst things you can show others. Putting yourself down, not sticking up for yourself and also being confident to the point of cockiness are all turn-offs! Change these ways!
8. Non-communicative Guys
Your husband just won’t open up. He just lost his job, his father is sick, and all he thinks about is financing your house, car insurance and other bills. You know he’s under enormous pressure and stress but he’s silent. He refuses to discuss his emotions.
Guys can be annoying. You ask them what they’re feeling and they a) don’t respond b) get angry c) walk away or d) all of the above. Unless you happen to have found that caring, sensitive (yet still manly man) who can admit to shedding a tear every now and then… those exist, right? As if a man like that is a unicorn; ideal, perfect in nature, caring, strong, affectionate… but doesn’t exist in the wild.
MEN: Don’t be afraid to open up once in a while. Women are curious by nature; we want to know what you are feeling and how you are assessing a certain situation. Without your input we feel as if you are unhappy or dissatisfied. To keep everyone happy, just open up a little with your significant other. Don’t hesitate to tell her about your day or inquire about anything she may be worrying about. It doesn’t make you any less of a man to get emotional or talk about your feelings. In fact, an inability to do so indicates to women a flaw in your character and a feeling of distrust in yourself.
WOMEN: You do it too. Don’t act all coy and innocent. When you get upset you sulk you start giving people the silent treatment – this isn’t fun for guys to interpret. Men will realize that you are angry or upset with them or something going on in your life but it is not helpful to anyone to act like a baby and ignore your issues. So be honest with what is upsetting you. Talk to your S.O. about something you may be facing or a problem you may have with them.
The bottom line is that nobody likes guessing games (unless you are four years old and playing the Memory game) and it’s very very important for each individual, and for a healthy relationship, to express your feelings and have honest and open discussions with your partner. Guys and girls alike, don’t be annoying by clamming up, let your partner know what’s going on with you and your bond can only grow stronger.
9. Ripping on the same sex
“Oh my god, look at what Carly is wearing! She looks like a fat cow! The only reason guys like her is because she’s so easy to get with…”
“Dude, check out Larry. What a ***. He looks like such a douche with his red shirt and he’s just a ***** and a ****! I can’t believe girls talk to him.”
This is extremely irritating to hear from someone. Didn’t your mother ever tell you that if you don’t have something nice to say, to not say anything at all? Well, she was right. There is nothing less appealing in a guy or a girl than a person who is constantly bashing the same sex.
Girls tend to slam promiscuous and scantily-clad women, or sometimes just anyone they dislike, may feel inferior to, threatened by, or for no reason at all. Stop yourself from doing this. You may dislike a person for God knows what reason, but you don’t need to vocalize it. Girls, especially, gossip compulsively and need the knowledge that other people agree with the statements that they are making about others. Stop it. By talking about other girls you look petty and unattractive. Friends you may have will wonder if you talk about them this way when they aren’t with you and guys will think you are classless and insecure. Really.
Guys are competitive creatures. They compete in sports, school, with other guys in looks, girls and almost anything. But when a guy is ripping on other dudes, it’s not cool. Girls prefer caring individuals who do not need to put others down in order to feel good about themselves. When guys insult other guys behind their backs, it’s seen as a haughty attempt at superiority, when really they just look insecure, jealous and aggressive.
So stop with the comments. Everyone knows that Carly sleeps around. Everyone knows that Larry is a jerk. No need to say it out loud yourself and look like the bad person. Just take care of yourself and stop spreading unnecessary hate.
10. People Who Rain On Your Parade
You just got an A on your final Politics exam, your best friend is visiting you in a few days from six states away and your parents have finally stopped calling you at three hour intervals. So what just ruined your day? Your friend thinks he has Ebola, he’s depressed, his sister is doing drugs again, his parents are getting divorced again and he may have to leave school for financial reasons …And there goes your happy day.
From the “I have cramps, my life sucks,” to the “I’VE BEEN BITTEN BY A VENOMOUS SNAKE, HELP!”, we just don’t want to hear it. I mean, don’t get me wrong, we all love our friends, we are interested in what they have to say, in the issues they are facing in their lives… However, when this complaining and depression turns into a constant ordeal, I think we all have a right to want to give them a few choice words… in caps lock, of course. When you find yourself having to completely ignore some people just for a few days or so because conversations become identically dismal, just know that you are not the only one. Sometimes no matter what you try to do to bring out a happy conversation, nothing helps:
“Oh look the sun’s out today!” “I’m allergic to the sun…”, or, “Look at that! The underdog team just won!” “Yeah but they’ll lose the next three…”
Just try your best to
a) not bludgeon these people when they bring you down and
b) not LET them bring you down.
While this is all EXTREMELY annoying in guys and girls alike, it shows a lot of character in someone who is able to handle the gloominess they are served and rise above it to remind themselves that the sun IS out today and that the underdog finally won a game.
And for you annoying folk who may or may not believe that this is referring to you: Please stop. Just be happy. Life is short. Tone it down. Don’t dwell on the bad things even if they seem overwhelming because other people are going through it too but with a smile on their face. This is not to say that your matters are unimportant, by all means share with your friends and family your concerns and if you are depressed do not hesitate to seek help for problems that may be daunting.
I know you’re not perfect, but hey, who is? If you find yourself doing some of the things on this list then you should try following my advice to change your ways. Annoying people are the worst and these are the top ten annoying things that people do. So if you can eliminate some of these factors from your life, I guarantee that you will be much more likeable to your friends and to strangers, because we can all spot a wealth-flasher, a chronic texter and an ice queen from a mile away. Don’t be that person. You’ll be a happier person if you can delete some of these annoying habits... and who doesn’t love being happy? Well… that’s another story.
Sara Tehrani is a sophomore studying English, Political Science and Music in Washington, DC. She is Persian, living on the East Coast of the US and enjoys writing, dancing, playing the piano, playing tennis, and volunteering at organizations like the American Red Cross and Special Olympics. Sara speaks three languages and is an aspiring lawyer.